PowerA Protection Case for PlayStation Portal Remote Player

I bought the PowerA PS Portal Protection Case in white because I am an adult who spent $200 on a remote play device and now must spend additional money to make sure nothing bad happens to it. This is the tax you pay for owning nice things. I have accepted this. The case fits the Portal. It zips shut. It has a little pocket inside for a cable. There is essentially nothing else to report, so let's get into the suggested review criteria, which were clearly written for a different product category entirely. Bass: None. Zero bass. The case produces absolutely no low-end frequency response, which is exactly what you want from a rigid shell designed to protect a piece of electronics. If your case is thumping, call someone. Not me. A professional. Mic: The case does not have a microphone, and I find this refreshing. It has never listened to my conversations, never misheard me ordering something online, and never asked me to speak more clearly. It is a zippered clamshell. It minds its business. Docking: You cannot dock the Portal while it is inside the case, because the case is closed. This is how cases work. If you are confused by this, I am not sure a Portal was the right purchase for you. Maybe start with a book. Sound quality: I zipped and unzipped it several times. Smooth action. Consistent tone. The zipper does not stick or stutter. If I had to review the zipper sound on a five-point scale, I'd give it a four. Lost a point because it's not musical enough. Where's the melody? The dynamics? Put some soul into it, PowerA. The case is white, which means it will stay white for approximately eleven minutes before collecting every stray mark and smudge in your bag. This is not a complaint. This is physics. You bought white. You knew what you were signing up for. Five stars. It protects the thing. The zipper works. It made no sound and that was the best sound of all.